Sunday, January 23, 2011

Sunday Night

I'm always a bit shocked when Sunday night rolls around. The weeks seem to go soooo slowly, and the weekends fly by! Not fair. Especially when your week consists of 6 work days. But! I crammed a lot of fun into my "weekend." Dinner and a movie, coffee, shopping, groceries, laundry. Whew! I need a weekend from my weekend.

As you all know, sometimes my posts are light and fluffy and sometimes they're heavy and serious. Tonight's is a bit serious. I'm hormonal, ok?! And I always hesitate about whether to share some of the more serious ones so I'm not labeled the occasional "emo" blogger... but, honestly, I'm ok with it. Sometimes, certain things need to be given a voice.

Sunday night always makes me a bit contemplative. I'm sure many of you are the same way- going over your calendar for the week, check lists of things to do, meetings and appointments. But it also makes me think of what I was doing last Sunday. And the Sunday before that. And Sunday, six months ago. A year ago.

I do that a lot. My co-workers tease me because I'm constantly the one saying, "It's February 16th. Do you know what we were doing February 16th, 2009? We were on a plane to LA for the Grammy auction..." Yes, I'm that girl.

And Sunday nights are the same way to me. They used to be my "family" night. The little family I had built for myself here in Tulsa. And even though a lot has changed in six months- wow, has it been that long, since my world changed so much?- sometimes those Sunday night routines, those wonderful long dinners and cuddling on the couch and that whole life I had comes back to float around me.

I don't spend a lot of time thinking about it, and I wish I could tell you it's because I'm the girl who lives in the here and now.

But, I'm that girl who remembers what I was doing February 16th, 2009. And I'm the girl who remembers every detail of August 4th, 2010 and August 14th, 2010, and a million Sunday nights.

I don't spend a lot of time thinking about it because sometimes it still makes my heart hurt too much.

It's amazing, though, what time does. Because lately, I think of Sunday night and remember Cooper's birthday party a few weeks ago. I remember my first Sunday night in my brand new house. I remember Sunday nights over the past six months spent blogging and planning the variety show and dreaming of trips I'm going to take.

Sundays of the past are becoming less important, and Sundays of the now... those are the dates I'm committing to memory.

Kinda heavy, huh? That's ok. I think I can sum it up by saying... living in the present is so much more fulfilling than living in the past. So I'm going to go finish my glass of wine and Sex & The City on TV. Sounds like a perfect Sunday night to me. :)

2 comments:

  1. I do the same thing about wondering what I was doing a week/month/year ago! Sometimes it is hard to let go of the past but it looks to me as if you are doing a great job living in the moment! :) Make new traditions for yourself :) prayers from your alabama blogger friend!
    -Kathleen

    ReplyDelete
  2. Kathleen, you are so sweet! And yes, it's all about making new memories and living in the now. :) Prayers back atcha! :)

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