Rallying

Day 3 of my blog-every-day-for-a-month challenge and I almost forfeited!

After a long & stressful day, drinks with coworkers and zoning in front of the TV for an hour, I almost kept my computer shut and called it a day.

But then I remembered how important this little exercise is to me- to really & truly blog for a month straight- and I rallied.

So, here we are. :)

I guess it goes to show that every blog post doesn't have to be a well-thought-out work of art. In fact, sometimes it's a bit more impromptu. And whether it's something that takes time to draft- like tomorrow's post, for instance- or something that's short & to the point, it all counts. Writing is writing, no matter what. Putting thoughts into words, honing writing skills, laying our thoughts out there- that's what makes us writers and bloggers, and that's what counts.

 I wanted to pass on the blogging for the day, but I'm so glad I didn't. Because even when it seems like an item on my to-do list or even something I'm not altogether looking forward to- it's like exercising: we do it to stay in shape, to get better.

A perfect teaser for tomorrow's post, in fact. :)

Playing It Safe

Today, I made a big decision... not to purchase something.

And while a large part of me feels like that was the responsible thing to do, the grown-up thing to do... the other part of me wants to throw myself on the ground and throw a temper tantrum because I didn't get what I want.

Cue Violet from Willy Wonka Chocolate Factory: But DADDY, I want it NOW!!!

The angel on my shoulder says, good job! That's the responsible 27-year-old girl we know and love. Use that extra cash to book yourself a massage!

And the devil on my shoulder says, are you scared to take risks?

Ugh. That's the thought that cuts me to the core.  Because I always want to take risks. I want to challenge myself and yes, do things that scare me. 

And the thought of playing it safe seems so... boring. So rational.

Where's the line between being responsible... and being cautious?

What's the right kind of risk to take?

My dad is taking a risk right now- and I couldn't be more proud of him. It's the right kind of risk. And I don't have a list of pros and cons for it; I just know.

So is that the determining factor? Something in our gut just tells us this is the right thing to do?

I guess that's where faith comes in. We can't possibly know if the risks we're taking- or not taking- are right or wrong without a lot of prayer... and even more faith. 

Today, I have to, I need to accept that this wasn't the risk I was supposed to take.

But tomorrow?  All bets are off.

The Routine (And Joy) of Writing

Well, here we are! November 1st.

I can't believe how quickly October flew by. In fact, I can't believe it's been over a week since my last blog post! I spent the last two weeks in a vicious cycle that went like this:

4:45am alarm. Work at 6am. Coffee, coffee, coffee. Produce. More coffee. Meeting. Switch to Pepsi. Lunch! Meeting. Eyes Cross. Home. Work out (sometimes). Crash into bed.

Yes, two weeks of that. 

What bugs me the most isn't the insane number of work hours; in fact, I'm thankful for my job so very much.

What bugs me is when I let my crazy schedule dictate life.

I have learned that when I am not on my schedule, I am not an entirely happy person.

I need to work out every day. I need to have quiet time every day. I need to spend time with my cat and absorb my house and have cocktails with my best friend and visit my family on the weekend.  I need to write- whether it's in my journal or on my blog. On top of work and paying bills and life- I need all of those things, in big doses or small, to keep a steady grasp on who I am.

That's why we're spending some extra time outside this week.

That's why I was awake 20 hours on Saturday- to work, then drive 4 hours to spend time with my family and go to a wedding with one of my best friends.

That's why I am contemplating buying a brand "new to me" bike.

And that's why I'm participating in this month's NaBloPoMo challenge.

Nablowhaaat, you say?

Remember the conference I went to in San Diego this year? BlogHer? NaBloPoMo is a monthly writing challenge the organization sponsors that gives a daily writing prompt... and off we-the-bloggers go to write our hearts away. Every day. For an entire month.

A weighty challenge, yes, but one I'm ready for.

Today's prompt: What is your favorite part about writing?

I think my answer is clear; it reminds me who I am. Just like all of the things I need- running, worshiping, laughter, family, friends- writing is an integral part of who I am. It allows me to see things about myself I don't see when I look in the mirror. It allows me to say things I don't get to speak out loud. It's a running conversation with myself about life; and I need it to keep being who I am.

So join me on this month-long journey! I'll have a new post every day. And as I get into this blogging routine- I'll be working on setting a few other routines back into motion, too.

Tune-Up

Ta-da!

My 1970-something Raleigh bike, looking like new!

Well, maybe not new. But close enough!

I decided that since right now is not the time to invest in a brand new bike- I may as well fix up the one I already have. So I bought a Groupon and despite the wide-eyed stares I got as I wheeled this bad boy through Sun & Ski to the bike department... I decided to go for the works. Lube up the gears. Replace the brake pads. Tighten the nuts and bolts.

My Raleigh deserves nothing but the best!

Of course the sweet bike enthusiast at the counter called me a few days later to make sure I wasn't doing any "serious riding" on this bike.

No worries there, buddy!  At least not yet. :)

The thing about tune-ups is that they're necessary. It's not always practical to trade the whole thing in and go brand new. I'm thinking about that a lot lately; I'm making my end-of-year doctor's appointments, prepping for my annual review at work and reflecting on all that was 2011; 2012 is just weeks away, you know. I'm tuning myself up- body, heart and mind.

Tune-ups are necessary. It's good to take a look at the gears.  Sometimes things get rusty or broken or just need a little TLC. It's important to replace the brake pads. We all need to stop every now and then. It's vital to get the alignment just right, the tires true. We've got to stay the course, keep pushing forward. The frame needs re-bending, the tires need air. Stand up straight and take a deep breath.

Yep, tune-ups are necessary. And even though the frame is still just a little bent out of shape (a certain car may or may not have run over the bike altogether recently) it's still standing strong.

A quick tune-up, and this bike is ready to rock and roll.

Unexpected

I had my first- and not last, I'm sure- major surprise expense as a homeowner this weekend.

My heater/AC unit... which so faithfully carried me through the double-dip snow storm this winter... and the record-breaking heat wave this summer... went kaput.

It's 10 years old, so it's not necessarily a shock. But when the technician broke the bad news Friday, I did what any strong, capable single homeowner does in that situation:

I bawled my eyes out.

Instead of my life flashing before my eyes, my "wish list" flashed before mine. A trip to Europe, a new bike, a Canon camera, and yes- several pairs of fabulous heels- all expenses I would have to put on hold for a new unit reeled through my mind. Gone! In a flash! Stupid AC. Dumb heater.

The good news? It's all going to be OK.  This is just a casualty of being a homeowner. The unit was replaced this weekend. And though I'm out a few bucks (ahem)... I worked out a payment plan that won't break the bank. Or dash my dreams completely.

I'm SO thankful for my parents- who walk me through these kinds of things. I'm thankful for a job that allows me to take care of these kinds of things. It's a small, tiny bump.

I'm sure I could make some major life ties here; bumps in the road happen. Ah, the joys of home ownership. It's not what happens, it's how you react.

But, I'm not going to. At the end of the day, my unit broke down. And I fixed it. And that's the end of it.

I'm going to appreciate the simplicity of it. Not everything in life can be fixed so quickly; this can, and for that I'm thankful.

So thankful, in fact- I might just go buy a pair of fabulous heels to celebrate.

Checklist? Check.

Some days, there are so many things I want to do that it just seems overwhelming. Do you ever get that feeling?

I'm not talking the litany of to-do's we all constantly have running through our head; my checklist has reached massive proportions, since we're talking about it.  Where did summer go?!  That car wash I've had on my to-do list since May needs to happen soon before my car is covered in 3 feet of snow.

But anyways... no, I'm referring to the big picture to-do's. Today, walking down the hall at work, I had a sudden thought.  Before I'm 30, I want a new bike, a Canon 5D and a trip overseas.

.... And still, a car wash.

Obviously it's a matter of prioritizing. I'm sure I can accomplish all of those things before 30. Just like my smaller, more manageable daily checklist; if I prioritize just right, I can pick up a bridesmaid dress AND redeem my AA miles for that big trip, all on Saturday!

Ah, checklists. Do they do us good? Or just remind us of the dot-dot-dot, the stuff that's still lingering out there to get done in a certain amount of time?

I'm the queen of checklists. I have a giant yellow notepad at work. I have lists on my computer, my iPad, my phone. Scraps of paper all over the house. Do, Do, Do, Check, Check, Check.

Some people really need those checklists to stay accountable, to remember. I'm one of those people who puts something I've already done on a checklist, just to check it off. So for me, I need less pressure.  It's OK if the checklist gets lost, things are crossed out prematurely or just neglected altogether.

No matter what, the "grind" always gets done. Bills are paid, dry cleaning is picked up, doctor's appointments are made. And yes, cars get cleaned before winter.

I'm ready to set my to-do list aside and focus a little bit more on my get-to-do list. Excited-to-do, Saving-Up-To-Do.

Note to self: create "can't-wait-to-do" checklist.

Second Lap

Today feels like summer's last hurrah.  It started cool, hit warm and balmy around mid-day and ended breezy with storms on the horizon. Currently, it's thundering and lightning outside. If I didn't know better- I'd say this is any Oklahoma day in April or May.

But, it's mid-October! And winter is knocking. We had a few days of fall- more than we usually get- and now it's time to surrender to the cold. 

I took a walk tonight and soaked it all in; no running, just walking and breathing in the air, the trees with their leaves still intact, the dry, empty riverbed. All of that will change in just weeks.

Ah! The rain literally just started as I type this. Tomorrow it will dip into the 30's; maybe Old Man Winter is closer than we think.

All of this talk of changing seasons makes me very aware that I've come full circle in my house. I'm on my second seasonal lap. I embraced a fall with golden leaves in my first backyard; I shoveled snow off my driveway in the winter; I prepped my most interior guest room closet during a particularly tornado-threatening spring; and I woke up before the sun to run during a brutal, record-breaking summer.

Yep, the first lap is complete.

The house itself is closer than ever to feeling "finished." I'm picking up pieces I love, decorating it slowly and with care. As with a lot of things in my life, it's been a project. Sometimes slow and frustrating- searching for the perfect piece, saving money. But all in all- it's been one of the most rewarding things I've ever done. 

I can't wait to show you all pictures! But for now, a little more time. There are a few final touches before the big reveal.

So, in the meantime, thanks house.

For filling my home with family and food on Thanksgiving...

For reminding me to have hope...

For keeping me warm....

For keeping me cool...

For returning a piece of my heart....

And for being such a beautiful place to call home.

Winter, come on down.  I can't wait for lap two.